PLUS / MINUS: SAKU KOIVU

Now that the Superiority of our team is beyond reproach, the authors of Habs Bros would like the readers' help in drawing up the plus and minuses of some of our particular players, not they are particular but that their selection is... First post, the reporter is already confused...
Anyhoo!,
Let us look at our Kapitan Extraordinaire, Saku Koivu.
Pluses:
1) Can someway say "KeeeeRUNCH-time!"? Anybody? Crunch-time, who's the man? Who is THE MAN? Thank you.
2) Can kick cancer's ass better than John Wayne. And that, friends and neighbours, is saying a HECK of lot about the guy.
3) Can see through a glazed eye. Verily, the hockey-gods have punished Williams for this affront.
4) Makes Latendresse look like Leclair. Makes Teemu look like Teemu. Who else can do this? Nobody, that's who.
5) Makes Bob Gainey gush out compliments like a busted hydrant. Who else can make Bob react this way? Nobody, that's who.
Minuses:
1) Getting old; won't play outside anymore.
2) Doesn't kick ass in the dressing-room when Markov pulls a Thornton.
3) Left a weird vision to fans when he sported a BLUE JERSEY! (Yes, we know it was ours, but still, freaky!)
4) Has yet to inscribe his name beside his predecessors.
We at Habs Bros are still left with the mantra, one that every Montrealer must chant with Pride:
Saku Koivu is a Champion. He works like a Champion, lives like a Champion, breathes like a Champion, probably mows his lawn in Turkavegablest (or whatever) like a Champion too, truth be told.
And one day soon, he will win a Championship.
Making us ALL Champions and reaffirming our rightful place in the Halls of Hockey Valhalla.
Yonder paradise we never should have left.
More updates as events warrant.