Monday, December 8, 2008


MONTREAL - With the arrival and outstanding play of Matt D'Agostini, a roster position on the Montreal Canadiens' roster is no longer sewn up for forward Sergei Kostitsyn. As a result, his frustration with coach Guy Carbonneau has culminated in a rebellious attack in the form of a flaming bag of shit.

Late Sunday evening, as Carbonneau left practice at the Bell Center and was walking towards his car, he was hit in the back by a blazing brown bag of excrement. When he turned, he saw Kostitsyn speeding away in his Porsche.

"It's disappointing for sure," commented the coach, "but if he'd played well to begin with, none of this would ever have happened. If he'd put as much effort into his play as he did with gathering, packaging, lighting, and subsequent throwing of that bag of shit, well..."

When asked how the coach would deal with the situation, he simply smiled and said, "never you worry about that. I've taken care of it."

On Monday morning, when approached for comment, Kostitsyn remained silent about the subject and merely continued to brush his teeth feverishly.

More updates as events warrant.


brad4thehabs said...

lol this is hilarious!

Boris420 said...

This has to be bullshit, I call shenanigans!!! I need proof.

The Habs-Man said...

I will investigate further to get you the evidence you desire... We shall now dub this event "poogate!"

Boris420 said...

I was reading your old blog and Its funny I noticed you saying that Markov was making too much money. Its funny how we all thought that at the time but now that you look at the rest of the D's in the league, most of them make more money then markov and are worse than him.

This might just be my opinion but I think he is better than alot of those D's.

BTW sorry to bring back old topics.

The Habs-Man said...

Not sure what post you're referring too. Don't think I suggested Markov was making too much. The only reference to money I could find was Kovalev's plus/minus (

That being said, Markov makes more money than me, so that automatically means he makes too much money.

raventalon40 said...

Hahahaha nice